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Top 10 reasons Stephen Colbert won't move 'The Late Show' to Los Angeles

Stephen Colbert visits
Stephen Colbert visits "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon" at Rockefeller Center on February 17, 2014 in New York City.
Theo Wargo/Getty Images for The Tonight Sho

CBS's announcement Thursday morning that Stephen Colbert is taking over from David Letterman as the host of "The Late Show" in 2015 seems to dim the likelihood of the show moving to Los Angeles, despite lobbying from L.A. Mayor Eric Garcetti. Reasons likely include everything from trying to retain "The Colbert Report" staff on his new show, family and more, but here's our top 10 reasons "The Late Show" is probably staying in New York.

10. He doesn't want "Saturday Night Live" to make fun of him the next time they do "The Californians"
9. He can't remember which Kardashian is which
8. He's already got a great deal living in Jon Stewart's pool house
7. The Los Angeles sun is a problem for his delicately pale skin
6. He's afraid of being attacked by Meatball the Glendale bear
5. Mayor Garcetti is already Los Angeles's number one musical fan
4. He heard that Senator Leland Yee is going to send Shrimp Boy after him
3. He's afraid of the backlash from his #CancelSriracha campaign.
2. He's waiting for the Big One to take out Craig Ferguson's studio so he can move in
1. He didn't want to be mysteriously run over by one of Jay Leno's classic cars

Why do you think Stephen Colbert is unlikely to move "The Late Show" out west? Let us know your own reasons in the comments or tweet us at @KPCC and @MikeRoe. Hashtag: #NoLAForColbert.